It's happened again

I received a phone call this morning and found out that my aunty is diagnosed with breast cancer. I know that chances of getting cancer is alot higher nowadays and that one in four women are diagnosed with breast cancer - it's more common.

I can't help feeling a knot of pain in my heart, hearing news like this. The pain was so painful that I can't even explain how sad I suddenly felt. I cannot say that I know how my aunty feels, but I can say, i'm pretty close. I can feel the sadness of my cousins, I can feel the sadness of friends and family that would know.

Even though my aunty is in it's very early stages - an operation needs to be performed (scheduled for end of this month) and Chemo. Hearing the word "Chemo" makes me shiver. Weight loss, vomiting, loss of hair... the list goes on. But who's to guarantee the cancer won't come back years later? Who's to say that once doctors have seen the cancer with their naked eye, it wouldn't of spread elsewhere?

This morning, I was lost for words. There's only so much I can say. Stay strong and we're thinking of you. But I know, in reality, they are just words and to them, it doesn't mean much. I can only offer them to call us if they need anything, and know that we'll be thinking of them. I will be praying that she is looked after and all goes well.

I tried to say " I hope she get's better soon" but for some reason, those words couldn't come out of my mouth. I don't know why. Deep inside, I know that some people just "cannot get better soon" and hearing it, just makes the conversation more silent, more awkward.

I hope that after the operation, all the bad things are gone and she can be happy again. Hope from the bottom of my heart that they won't come back and attack her again.